Reading “The Book of Illusions.” There’s a deeply psychological exploration of the protagonist’s choice to travel by airplane. What led him to intend to get through the flight with sleeping pills? The fear brought by the death of his wife and children in a plane crash, the desire to experience the thrill of death, the guilt of the living toward the dead. Finally, the protagonist realizes that he’s afraid to admit that his wife and children’s deaths were meaningless and random.

I suddenly realized that death is inherently random and arbitrary. Anyone, including my family and friends, could die in the next moment due to accidents or underlying issues. I occasionally think about my parents supporting this family and wonder what I would do if they suddenly passed away. But I’ve never considered that they, including myself and everyone else, could die at any time. This realization terrifies me.

Before, I simply thought that living in the present meant living each day as if it were my last. I never realized how I should live if today were the last day for those around me, how I should view interpersonal relationships.

(Note: This article was originally written in Chinese and translated to English by AI. Please excuse any imperfections in expression.)